WoW Jokes

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WoW Jokes

Post  Slot on Mon Mar 15, 2010 4:49 pm

From Tuarwen forum posts, Requiem server:

A Dwarf, a Human and a Gnome are in a bar having a drink when a great-looking female Gnome comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me."

So the Dwarf says, "I love liver and cheese." The female replies, "That's not good enough."

The Human says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says, "That's not creative enough."

Finally, the Male Gnome says, "Liver alone . . . cheese mine."

Another one:
One day a Human mage named Gilibon was walking out of Stormwind, when he noticed his good friend Karn the Paladin approaching. He was surprised however to notice Karn was riding towards him on what appeared to be a black panther. And of course, a human on a panther is a very odd sight in Azeroth.

So Gilibon goes up to his friend, shocked and asks, "Karn! Where in the world did you get that panther? Its beautiful!

Karn smiled and explained as he climbed off his new mount. "Well, its an interesting story. Yesterday as I was leaving Darnassus, a Night Elf woman rode up to me on this panther. Now this had to be the most beautiful female I have ever seen, Night Elf, Human or otherwise! She was absolutely exquisite!

Gilibon smiled as he pictured her in his head. "Really, my friend? Well what happened then?"

"Well this lovely Night Elf climbed off her panther, proceeded to rip off all of her clothing and lay down on the grass before me with legs opened wide." Karn shrugged as he finished his story. "Then she said to me, 'take whatever you want'."

Let me know if you want more... Smile

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Re: WoW Jokes

Post  Slot on Tue Mar 16, 2010 2:29 pm

One day this Orc warrior gets his eye gouged out by a rabid gnome,terrfied of eye patches the orc decides for the rest of his life he has to get a wooden eye. This of course made the other orcs, trolls and tauren make fun of him, for a long long time. Now one night while visiting Brill, there is a dance at the local bar, the orc sees this really attractive Undead female and realises that she has a disfigured face(like most of them), the orc immediately gets the idea that since she shares a physical defect much like himself he should try to get her to dance with him. The orc asks her if she wants to dance and she exclaims, "would I!?" and the orc says "don't call me wood eye **** face"

A Human, Gnome, and Dwarf trio of explorers gets captured by a tribe of Trolls in Stranglethorn vale where, tied to posts and surrounded by the whole tribe, the Witch Doctor confronts them.

He explains to all three: You have been found guilty of violating our territory and must be punished. However, according to our ancient laws, you have the right to choose your punishment!! (he walks up to the human). For tresspassing, your choice of punishment is either Death ... or Ooga-Booga!

The human doesn't even have to consider. What could be worse than dying in this forsaken wilderness?? "I choose Ooga-Booga".

Immediately, he is cut down from the post and tied face-down to the ground. Ten exceptionally large troll warriors step forth and gang-**** him for an hour. Finally, whimpering and bleeding, he is cast into the river and allowed to get away.

Now the Gnome is up. Horrified by what he has seen, he still doesn't want to die and now knows that he can, indeed, get away, He chooses Ooga-Booga as well. He suffers the same humiliating fate as the human, and an hour later he is thrown in the river and gets away.

The proud Dwarf has been listening to screams of pain for two hours now. He looks the witch doctor in the eye and says, I would rather die than be so humiliated. I choose Death!!

"Well spoken, brave warrior!" The witch doctor replies, then raises his voice so the whole tribe can hear. "I hereby sentence you to death --- by Ooga-Booga!!!"

Two gnomes go into a bar one evening, and one of them picks up a very open minded, very beautiful and very drunk night elf female. He, his friend and the frisky night elf then went to her place in Darnassus. He then accompanied her into her bedchamber while his friend waited in the next room.

It was then that he heard his freind crying to the female, "I can't do it! I just can't do it!"

The next morning he asked his lucky friend what had happend.

He sadly shook his head in reply. "I just couldn't do it!"

"Performance problems, huh? Couldn't get it up?"

That earned him a scowl. "No!" he snapped. "I couldn't get on the stupid bed!"

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